“Alpha male” means you suck up to a man who wears makeup

They preach strength and dominance, then ask millions of men to model themselves on a deeply fragile leader.

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The MAGA movement has spent years lecturing the rest of us about masculinity.

We are told that “real men” are stoic, physically dominant, authoritative, unflinching. Men are supposed to be providers, leaders, protectors. Men are men, women are women, and anyone who complicates that picture is supposedly destroying Western civilization.

This is not just a cultural aesthetic. It has been turned into a political weapon. The right uses this cartoon version of masculinity to delegitimize opponents. Democrats are feminized, “soy,” “beta,” weak, emotional. The message is that we need to get back to a simpler, more “manly” time.

You hear it from Trump allies. You hear it in the manosphere from people like Andrew Tate. You hear it constantly in right wing media. The word “alpha” gets thrown around like confetti.

But if you look at who actually gets elevated as “alpha” in this ecosystem, the whole project collapses under its own hypocrisy.

Meet the MAGA Alpha Trio

A recent video that circulated in right-wing media is a perfect example. It is clearly meant to project toughness.

The video features three prominent Trump world figures:

• Pete Hegseth, Trump’s Defense Secretary

• J.D. Vance, the Vice President

• Stephen Miller, senior policy adviser and long-time Trump loyalist

They are walking through what appears to be Union Station in Washington, D.C., in slow motion. The footage is set to aggressive music. The camera zooms in on Vance. The pacing and visuals are designed to say: here they are, the strong men of the new right, the embodiment of modern conservative strength.

If you have seen any political hype video, you know the formula. This is the “alpha” aesthetic in its purest form.

But once you stop looking at the editing and start looking at the people, the illusion falls apart.

The Fox News Tough Guy Who Folds On Command

Let’s start with Pete Hegseth.

He is sold to the MAGA audience as the quintessential American man. Tough. Patriotic. Battle tested. Beard, flannel, a certain “barstool patriot” vibe.

In reality, Hegseth’s public profile is built on promoting baseless conspiracy theories and culture war grievances. He pushed birther-adjacent nonsense. He amplified lies when it was useful. Then, when it became politically inconvenient or out of step with Trump’s messaging, he adjusted.

He is not a model of principled strength. He is a model of performative toughness that melts into subservience whenever the boss needs a different narrative.

That is not “alpha.” That is opportunism dressed up in tactical pants.

The Working-Class Hero With Eyeliner and a Revised Origin Story

Then there is J.D. Vance.

Vance has carefully crafted a persona as the grizzled heartland truth-teller. The guy from “Hillbilly Elegy” who grew up in chaos, clawed his way out, and now speaks hard truths about coastal elites and their supposedly soft, decadent, effeminate values.

In MAGA world, this is supposed to make him a man’s man. Rugged, no nonsense, grounded in “real America.”

But look a little closer.

First, there is the obvious: Vance increasingly appears in public with what looks like eyeliner. I do not care about that. Makeup has nothing to do with your intelligence, your ethics, or your ability to govern. People should be able to present themselves however they want.

The problem is not the eyeliner. The problem is the hypocrisy.

This is a political movement obsessed with rigid gender norms and moral panic over anything that deviates from a very narrow view of masculinity. They target LGBTQ people, they demonize trans and gender nonconforming people, they insist that even mild gender nonconformity is some kind of civilizational threat.

Yet one of their main “alpha” figures is, stylistically, doing something that would get almost anyone outside their tribe mocked and vilified by that same audience. And on top of that, there are real questions about how accurately Vance has portrayed his upbringing, which appears significantly more middle class and stable than the mythology suggests.

Again, the issue is not how he looks. The issue is that the standards they use to attack others somehow do not apply to the movement’s favored sons.

The Architect Who Would Fail His Own Movement’s Vibe Check

Then we get to Stephen Miller.

By the right’s own metric of “alpha,” Miller does not fit the mold. He is short. He is bald. He is not physically imposing. None of that should matter in a sane political culture. If someone has good ideas, we can evaluate the ideas.

But remember, this is the same culture that elevates physical dominance, stature, and a kind of crude aesthetic of “toughness” as essential to leadership. They endlessly mock perceived weakness in others. They ridicule height, weight, hairlines, voices.

By the standards they impose on everyone else, Miller does not qualify as an alpha anything. Yet in this video, he is framed as one of the movement’s pillars of strength.

You can start to see the pattern.

The One Man They All Serve

So what actually unites Hegseth, Vance, and Miller?

It is not physical toughness. It is not emotional resilience. It is not principled independence.

It is complete subservience to one man.

All three have built their current power and relevance on loyalty to Donald Trump. They are not dominant in their own right. They orbit the person they insist is the ultimate alpha.

And that person is an elderly, obese man who:

• Refuses to exercise

• Covers his face in makeup

• Is notoriously vain and obsessed with his appearance

• Reacts to criticism like an aggrieved YouTube commenter

Again, none of this would matter in isolation. There are plenty of older, out-of-shape politicians. The problem is the gap between the image and the reality.

The movement tells young men that a real man is disciplined, physically formidable, and in control. Then it asks them to worship someone who is the exact opposite in almost every visible way, simply because he projects cruelty and refuses to admit fault.

The unifying trait among his lieutenants is not strength. It is a willingness to abandon whatever principles they claimed to hold and let Trump walk all over them.

At that point, we are not talking about alphas. We are talking about vassals.

The New Definition of “Alpha”

If you strip away the music, the slow motion, and the social media fan edits, what is actually being sold as “alpha” in this ecosystem?

Not:

• Integrity

• Moral courage

• The ability to stand up to your own side when it is wrong

Instead, the dominant men in this culture are the ones who:

• Display the most theatrical loyalty to Trump

• Attack his enemies with the least hesitation

• Tolerate the most humiliation in exchange for proximity to power

Being “alpha” is no longer about strength. It is about who is most willing to flatter the right people, echo the right talking points, and never, under any circumstances, publicly contradict the leader.

That is not masculinity. That is fealty.

And it is remarkable how many people who shout about being “real men” are perfectly happy to line up and prove their loyalty by surrendering their autonomy.

If You Find This Pathetic, You Are Not Alone

Here is where I want to speak directly to anyone on the right who looks at this and feels embarrassed.

If you are a conservative who values independence, personal responsibility, and courage, none of this should impress you. It should make you angry.

You are being sold an image of masculine strength that is really just coordinated boot licking. You are being told that this is what a “real man” looks like while the people doing the loudest lecturing do not live by the standards they impose on everyone else.

If you see that and think, this is pathetic, you are not the problem. You are the person I am talking to.

You are welcome here.

Even if we do not agree on the top marginal tax rate or the exact size of government, there is room for common cause around something very basic. We do not have to live in a political culture where masculinity is defined by corruption, hypocrisy, and blind loyalty to one man.

If you are tired of being told how you should live, how others should live, and who counts as a “real man” by people who do not meet their own criteria, I want you in this conversation.

Join us, whether you consider yourself liberal, conservative, or something else entirely. If you are against corruption and against this hollow, weaponized version of masculinity, there is a movement here for you.

Let me know what you are seeing in your own circles. Do people actually buy into this alpha cosplay, or are they quietly rolling their eyes while pretending to go along? Tell me in the comments.

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